


Time Ticks Away

by sabreslove9



Category: Torchwood
Genre: Abuse, M/M, Self Harm, Sexual Abuse, i was in a dark place when i wrote this, i wrote it forever and a day ago, not sure if i like it
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-20
Updated: 2013-10-20
Packaged: 2017-12-29 22:27:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,847
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1010858
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sabreslove9/pseuds/sabreslove9
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Well then. I'm still unsure as to how I feel with this fic. I'm hoping that someone out there likes it more than I do. Constructive criticism is always welcome!</p></blockquote>





	Time Ticks Away

Ianto Jones stood in the Hub, rubbing his eyes tiredly. He hadn’t slept much the night before because of a series of nightmares that were stranger than the ones that normally plagued his sleep. He had been kept awake half the night, and it was only by strength of will that he had managed to drag himself out of bed and go into work against his gut instinct, which told him that something was going to happen to him today.

“Everything all right, Yan?” Jack Harkness, his boss and lover, asked worriedly. “You’re not looking so good right now.”

“I’m fine,” Ianto replied, “I just didn’t get much sleep last night.” As if to confirm his words, a huge yawn escaped his mouth. “I kept having nightmares,” he added quietly. Jack stepped forward, pulling Ianto into a hug.

“Do you want to take the day off to get some rest?” he asked. Ianto shook his head, wrapping his arms around Jack’s waist.

“No, I’ll be all right,” Ianto replied. Jack raised his eyebrows, a look of concern for his coworker and lover creeping into his eyes.

“All right, as long as you’re sure. Tosh is bringing us breakfast,” he said. Ianto smiled up at him, and Jack couldn’t help himself; he leaned down and kissed Ianto on the lips, very softly. “If I catch even one hint that you’re sick or otherwise, I’m sending you home,” he said. Ianto made a face and Jack laughed.

“Understood, sir.”

\---

Jack sat in his office, signing papers and writing off documents. He heard a bang outside of his door and jerked his head up, listening for any other sounds. Hearing nothing, he shrugged it off and went back to his paperwork, keeping an ear out for anything else that might be strange or unusual. He heard another bang and jumped up, throwing his pen down and instantly reaching for his gun. Slowly, he made his way toward the door, looking around cautiously for anything out of place. He saw Ianto across the room, and they locked eyes for a moment. Ianto’s eyes went wide suddenly, and Jack felt a knife dig into his chest. He gasped and fell to his knees as someone stepped around him.  
He lay prone on the ground, bleeding slowly from the stab wound. He knew he was dying, and there was no way to stop it. He turned his head weakly, trying to force himself to focus on the figures that seemed so far away, but were only on the other side of the Hub. He rolled onto his side, struggling toward them, when the one closest to him turned around.

"Well, it seems our dear Captain isn't dead yet," the man said in a pleasantly playful voice. Jack recognized it, but he couldn’t place it in the state he was in. "It seems I have a decision to make." He made a face that mocked one of a person thinking deeply about something before making a decision he'd probably already made. In two strides, he had reached Jack and kicked him across the chest, sending him sliding backwards. Jack groaned, his eyes fluttering closed, before he forced them open at a scream.

"No!" he tried to yell, but his strength was fading rapidly as the man grabbed Ianto and dragged him away.

\---

Jack gasped, breathing heavily as his eyes flew open. He had died, he knew, but he struggled to remember what happened before that. Flashes of pain and blood, and he remembered someone being there that didn’t belong. He remembered Ianto being afraid and anger filled him as he remembered the man dragging him away.

“Damn it!” he shouted as he struggled to sit up. A hand on his shoulder stopped him, and he glared up into Owen Harper’s face. “I need to go after him. I need to find him,” Jack growled. Owen shook his head.

“Not until I check you out. You died again,” he replied. Jack shook his head stubbornly, struggling to remove himself from Owen’s grip, but Owen tightened his hand. “Jack, rushing into this blindly isn’t going to help us get Ianto back. Let me check you out, and we’ll come up with a plan as we go,” he said, meeting Jack’s fury with calmness. “Come on, Tosh and Gwen are looking for you.” He helped Jack to his feet and led him to the medical bay, sitting him down as Toshiko Sato ran toward them, pausing as she reached them. Jack looked up at her, pain and fear in his eyes, and he bowed his head as she stepped forward and embraced him tightly.

“We’ll get him back, I promise,” she whispered into his ear, holding him tightly. Owen pried her off in order to examine their boss’ physical condition before nodding.

“You’ll be all right,” he said, “but if you work too hard, I will make you take a break. You can’t go overexerting yourself so soon after dying,” he added in response to Jack’s glare. “You won’t be any good if you drop from exhaustion.” Jack gave a resigned sigh and lowered his gaze.

“I’m sorry,” he said softly. “I’m just… I’m really worried about him. I don’t want him to get hurt.” A tear fell down his cheek and he brushed it roughly away, forcing back the other tears that threatened to spill from his eyes. Tosh squeezed his shoulder gently, putting an arm around his shoulders.

“I promise, we’ll do everything we can to help bring him home,” she said again. “If he’s got his mobile on him, I can track –“ She cut off as Jack held up his mobile phone. “Oh,” she said softly, blushing.

“It was a good thought,” Jack said, a ghost of a smile on his face.

“Jack, you need to come see this,” Gwen Cooper’s voice drifted down from the top floor. The three of them rushed up the stairs, Jack in the lead, and he stopped in front of the computer Gwen was staring wide eyed at. He looked and saw a video file was on the screen. Holding his breath, he clicked the link which opened a live feed. They watched as a man came into view, dragging a prone body along behind him. He tied the person to the wall, slapping his cheek lightly with his palm when he’d finished.

“Get comfy, eye candy,” the man said. “You’re going to be here for a while.” Jack’s body went cold as he recognized the voice of John Hart. He didn’t understand how he hadn’t gotten it sooner. John stared at the camera and, through it, at Jack. “I hope you’re watching this right now, Jack,” he said. “And I can hope that you won’t come after him, but let’s face it, we both know you can’t let him go. I’ll give you an ultimatum: You have three days to find and rescue him. If you can’t get him by then, he’s mine.” Jack’s hands clenched and unclenched spasmodically as he glared at the screen. John laughed and stepped away as Ianto awoke. “Three days, Jack. Three days.” Jack sank to the ground, holding back tears as Tosh typed rapidly, fingers flying across the keys in an untraceable manner.

“Jack, it’s going to be all right,” Gwen said, sitting next to him and rubbing his shoulder gently. “We’ll find him.”

“This isn’t going to be easy,” Tosh said, her eyes watching the screen. “I can’t get his IP address. I can’t even get anything in the area.”

“We’ll work something out,” Jack replied, his eyes on the screen. “We’ll get him back,” he whispered. “And as soon as I get him back, I’ll never let him go again.” He stiffened as John turned back around.

“Oh, by the way, enjoy the show, love.”

\---

Ianto screamed as the whip landed across his back again. He heard the crack and cried out again as another blow landed. He tried to catch his breath, but another scream tore from his lips as he was hit again.

“God, your screams are so hot,” John breathed into his ear. “I’m getting hard just from that, eye candy.” To prove his point, he rubbed the growing bulge between his legs on Ianto’s thigh. “Shall we get on with it, then?” he purred, untying Ianto from the wall. Ianto began to struggle, but John’s grip was too strong.

“No, stop, let me go!” Ianto cried, fighting against him. John chuckled, reaching down to undo Ianto’s belt and unbutton his trousers. He reached into his pants, touching him through his undergarments. Ianto struggled again, crying out as John pulled off his trousers and undergarments in one smooth motion. He tied Ianto to the wall again and began to remove his own clothes. He pressed his body against Ianto’s, catching his mouth in a rough kiss.

“God, you taste so good,” John groaned, running his hands up and down Ianto’s back. He kissed down his jaw and neck, bending over slightly to suck and tease his nipples. He got onto his knees and took Ianto’s cock in his hand. “I’ll show you more pleasure than Jack could ever give you,” he said softly, kissing up Ianto’s thigh. He began to stroke his length gently as he took one of his balls in his mouth, sucking it gently and licking its partner. Ianto cried out, trying to desperately free his wrists from his bonds, and John pulled away suddenly, standing to look Ianto in the eye. “It’s no use struggling, beautiful,” he said. “You won’t get free unless I let you go.”

“Let me go! Let me go!” Ianto screamed, tears falling from his eyes.

“Don’t cry, love,” John whispered, gently wiping his tears. “I can give you pleasure. I promise you’ll enjoy it.” Ianto cried out, trying to pull himself from John’s grip. John’s eyes darkened, and he slapped his cheek. “Fine, I can see how you want this.” He moved behind Ianto, grabbing hold of his hips and thrusting roughly into him. Ianto screamed in pain as John mercilessly pounded into him. Tears fell down his cheeks as he realized that, besides the burning pain, he was beginning to enjoy it. He let out a soft whimper and John stopped, staring at the gorgeous man in his arms. He pulled himself out of Ianto and moved to stand in front of him, pulling his chin up to stare into his eyes.

Ianto didn’t speak as John brushed away his tears, kissing him more gently than he had earlier. Ianto surprised him by kissing back. John pulled away to untie the Welshman, and Ianto wrapped his arms around John’s neck, connecting their lips again in a passionate kiss. I’m sorry, Jack, he thought, hating himself for what he was doing. I’m so sorry. Forgive me. Please forgive me.

\---

Jack watched in a stunned silence as Ianto gave in to John. He turned abruptly as John took Ianto’s cock into his mouth, unable to bear watching the scene unfold.

“Jack, are you all right?” Tosh asked, laying a gentle hand on his shoulder.

“Yeah,” he said quietly. “It’s just hard to watch this. I know he’s doing it to save himself from pain, but I can’t watch this anymore.” He shook his head and walked away as he heard Ianto’s moans get louder. Tosh was about to turn off the screen when she saw something in the background of the room that was familiar.

“Jack, I think I know where he is,” she said. Jack turned back around, watching the screen intently.

“That looks like the prison I found you in,” he said to her. She nodded.

“I think it is. But how did he get there so quickly? It took us a day and a half to get here after you rescued me,” Tosh said. Jack’s face darkened.

“I think I know how he did it,” he said darkly. He held up his arm, showing the brown wristband he never used. “This can be used to transport one or two people any distance they want. He probably took Ianto and used this to get him away from us.” His face hardened in determination. “We should leave now. We don’t have much time left to save him.”

\---

Ianto lay panting on the ground, John standing over him. He leaned down and kissed him gently. He lifted him off of the ground by his arms.

“That was the pleasure, love,” he said softly into his ear. “Now comes the pain.” He pulled Ianto back toward the ropes, tying him to the wall again. He pulled out the whip and a knife from his back pocket. “Sorry, eye candy,” he said, “but it has to be this way.” He brought the whip down hard on his back, slashing on the back of his leg with the knife simultaneously. Ianto cried out, digging his nails into his palms. John brought the whip down several more times, slashing at his legs and arms in turn. His vision went gray around the edges, and he was barely aware that John had moved away from him. He was starting to black out when John returned. He was dimly aware that something was being poured across his wounds, causing them to burn worse. His tortured scream hung in the air before his eyes rolled back into his head. Before he passed out, he heard John whisper, “I’m sorry, eye candy, but this is the only way to get through to him.”

\---

Jack sat in the driver’s seat, clutching the steering wheel tightly, his knuckles turning white as he stared at the road, barely paying attention to the road in front of him. He drove as quickly as he could, trying desperately to reach Ianto in time. Gwen and Owen were asleep in the back seat, Gwen resting her head on Owen’s shoulder. Jack had to focus on not crashing the car or bashing his head into the steering wheel. He was desperate to get Ianto back and was lost in his thoughts when Tosh’s voice cut through the silence.

“Jack, you have to hurry, please,” she begged. “John’s really hurting Ianto and I don’t know how much longer he can last against him.” He could hear the tears in her voice, and his foot pressed onto the gas pedal even harder. He felt a blind rage flying through him and tried to push it down as he kept driving. He almost lost control of both his emotions and his car as he continued to drive as quickly as he could toward the UNIT prison. His vision blurred as he fought back tears of rage.

“Thanks, Tosh,” he said in a harsh whisper. He drove faster, losing control of the car several times as he raced against the clock to reach the man he loved.

\---

Ianto came to, a severe pain in his back, arms and legs. He groaned as the ropes forced his body to stretch in a painful way. He turned his head and saw John watching him, his face blank of emotions. He flinched and looked away, tugging desperately at the ropes. He was afraid, afraid for his life, afraid that Jack wouldn’t reach him in time. He cried out in desperation, tears forming in his eyes as John walked toward him. He looked closer and saw the sorrow in John’s eyes.

“I’m sorry,” he said softly, “but your pain is the only thing that can get Jack to want to face me.”

“Why are you doing this? What are you planning?” Ianto asked, ceasing to struggle.

“I can’t say, eye candy,” John replied. “I just need him to come and try and rescue you.” Ianto shook his head violently as John brought the knife out again. “Time for another round, love,” he said, pressing the knife against Ianto’s chest. He pushed it in and drew it along the sensitive skin, causing the man to cry out and thrash around, trying to move away from John’s knife.

“Please stop!” Ianto cried out. “Please!” He screamed louder as John brought the knife down again, his eyes rolling back as he pushed it a little too deep into him. He felt another pull of the knife across his skin before he lost consciousness again.

\---

Jack had driven for almost a day and a half straight, pulling up to the building. He had less than twelve hours to find Ianto, and he intended to find him as quickly as possible. He roused Gwen and Owen and headed into the building, listening for any possible sounds that could lead him to Ianto. There were many cells, and it would take too long to check every single one for Ianto. He felt a rising panic and rage inside of him, fueling his adrenaline rush as he sprinted down the hallway. He growled low in his throat, listening for any signs of Ianto or John. He heard a scream of tortured pain, a scream from a voice that he recognized and raced toward the room the scream had come from before it cut off abruptly. He saw a door at the far end of the hallway open and John Hart walked out. Jack yelled in rage and slammed into John.

“Where is he? Where is Ianto?” he screamed, slamming his fist into John’s face. “TELL ME!” Tears of rage streamed down his face. John leaned up, pressing his face closer to Jack’s.

“He’s in there, but you have to get through me first, darling,” John whispered, drawing a knife from his jacket and stabbed Jack in the chest. Jack howled in pain as he drew the knife out and kicked at John, trying to get the other Time Agent off of him. He punched and kicked, fighting John off as Gwen raced in to help. Owen jumped into the action, and Gwen turned her head toward Jack for a moment.

“We’ll hold him off, get Ianto out of here!” she cried before turning her attention to John. Jack ran into the cell and raced to untie Ianto. Ianto cried out at the sound of footsteps in the room.

“Let me go!” he cried. “Let me go!”

“All right, Ianto,” Jack said, holding his hands up. “I’m here. I’ll let you down.” He spoke as if he was talking to a wounded animal, approaching cautiously. Ianto’s cries quieted as he heard Jack’s voice.

“Jack,” he whispered. Jack pulled the other man down as Ianto clasped him with a sob. He stroked Ianto’s hair gently with one hand, holding him by the waist with the other.

“We’ll get you out of here, I promise,” he whispered into Ianto’s ear. Ianto sobbed into Jack’s shoulder, hands gripping Jack tightly. He pulled away slightly, staring into Jack’s eyes.

“I didn’t think you’d make it in time,” he admitted, sniffling a little as Jack wiped his tears.

“Neither did I,” Jack admitted, “but I’m glad that I did. I don’t know what I’d do without you.” He held Ianto close again for a moment.

“Jack! We need your help!” Gwen cried suddenly. Jack pulled away from Ianto, kissing him briefly.

“I’ll be back,” he said. “Stay here, I’ll come back once we’re done with John.” Ianto nodded and Jack ran out. Ianto spotted John’s knife on the ground and reached out, gripping it tightly and tucking it into his pocket. He sufficiently hated himself for enjoying what John had done to him. He squeezed his eyes shut, whimpering to himself.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” he whispered over and over, rocking back and forth. Jack walked back in the room, slightly bruised and covered in blood, and he returned to Ianto’s side. He reached down and lifted Ianto up, bridal style, into his arms.

“Let’s get you out of here,” he said softly into Ianto’s ear. He walked out, carrying Ianto, as Owen climbed into the driver’s seat. Gwen slid into the passenger’s seat after depositing John into the back of the car, leaving Jack and Ianto alone in the back of the SUV. Jack held Ianto close, rocking him gently back and forth and humming lightly. Ianto fell asleep, listening to the sound of Jack’s heartbeat and the soft humming.

\---

Ianto awoke suddenly in his own bed, a warm body pressed against his. He heard a light snoring and turned his head to see an arm draped across his midsection, holding him gently. He smiled a little as he realized it was Jack, but the smile fell away as he recalled his horrible betrayal of Jack. A tear slid down his cheek, and he fought back a sob as Jack stirred.

“Hey,” he said sleepily, smiling softly at Ianto. His face fell and he reached out to pull Ianto into his arms as he spotted the younger man’s tears. “It’s all right,” he murmured, “you’re safe now.”

“I betrayed you,” Ianto gasped, letting his pain and sorrow out in his sobs. “I betrayed you. I… I enjoyed what John did to me.” He hung his head in shame. “I don’t deserve your love. I don’t deserve your kindness.”

“Ianto, you didn’t betray me,” Jack said, kissing the top of his head gently. “I know how John is, I know how good he is at giving someone else sexual pleasure. You didn’t betray me. He seduced you, and not many people can resist John Hart when he seduces someone.”

“Even you?” Ianto asked bitterly.

“Especially me,” Jack replied softly. Tears started to fall down Ianto’s cheeks and Jack stroked his hair gently as the thin body in his arms convulsed with his sobs. “It’s all right,” he whispered. “It’s all right.” They stayed like that for a long moment before Ianto pulled away. “Do you want me to make breakfast?” Jack asked softly. Ianto nodded and Jack pulled him in for one last kiss before getting out of bed. He had told everyone that neither he nor Ianto would be in to work for a few days, so they didn’t have to rush.

As soon as Jack was done in the room, Ianto retrieved the knife from its place under his pillow. He held it tightly in his left hand and stared at it for a few moments before pressing it against his skin. It had been a long time since he’d last done this, and he bit his lip to keep from crying out as he dragged the knife across his skin, watching as it instantly left a trail of blood. It was too easy to fall back into old habits as he made cuts from his wrist all the way up to his elbow. Once his right arm was covered in cuts, he transferred the knife to his right hand and started on his left arm. He was beginning to get lightheaded from the blood loss when Jack walked back in.

“Ianto, breakfast is don—“ he froze, watching as his lover pulled the knife across his arm in slow, even strokes, tears falling from his eyes. He rushed to his side as the knife fell from his hand and caught him before he could fall off of the bed. His eyes filled with tears as he cradled Ianto. “Why? Why why why?” he whispered. “Why would you do this to yourself?” He lay Ianto down gently, going to the bathroom for a damp cloth and some bandages. He gently washed the wounds and bound them tightly before laying Ianto in the guest room so he could change the blood covered sheets and wash the mattress.

\---

Ianto awoke some time later and found himself staring at Jack’s concerned face. He tried to sit up, but Jack pushed him back down. He realized that his arms were wrapped in bandages and the sheets had been changed. He looked away from Jack, unable to meet the concern and love in his eyes.

“Why did you do this?” Jack asked, a tone of sorrow in his voice. He wasn’t angry with Ianto; he was genuinely concerned about him. “Ianto, please look at me.” Ianto shook his head. He didn’t deserve this man’s love. “Ianto, please, I need to know that you’re all right.” Jack was desperate and worried, and Ianto couldn’t bear it anymore. He looked up into Jack’s eyes and saw himself reflected there. He flinched; his face was pale and sunken, his eyes were dead, his body was limp. He shuddered and allowed Jack to pull him into a tight embrace.

“I’m sorry,” he whispered. “I’m so, so sorry, Jack.” He didn’t have any more tears to cry, but his body trembled in Jack’s arms. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. I just… I’m falling apart.” Jack held him tighter, fighting tears of his own. He hated seeing his lover like this, and he wished he could help him.

“You don’t have to apologize, Ianto,” Jack said. “I’m always here for you, no matter what.” Ianto held him tighter, and they stayed there for a while before Jack slowly pulled away. “Come on, let’s get you cleaned up and fed.” Jack led Ianto to the bathroom, making sure he’d be all right, and he went back to the bedroom to pull out clean clothes for the man. He made sure Ianto didn’t try anything to farther harm himself before leading him downstairs to eat the pancakes he’d made for them for breakfast.

\---

It was several weeks before either of the men were able to return to work. Jack wouldn’t let Ianto out of his sight after the self harm incident, and he suspected that there had been more than just the one he’d walked in on. He couldn’t help but worry about Ianto; the man was his love, his life, and he couldn’t bear to watch him suffer like this. When they did finally return to work, everyone could see that Ianto was still in pain, and he would jump whenever someone walked into the Tourist Office. One day, just before lunch, Jack left his office and stood in the doorway, watching silently as Ianto drew the knife from his desk drawer, rolling up his sleeves and pressing the knife against his skin. He watched as his lover closed his eyes and let his head fall back before allowing the knife to press in deeper, and he jumped as Jack laid a restraining hand on his arm.

“Enough,” Jack said softly, taking the knife from Ianto’s numb fingers. “I can’t watch you do this to yourself anymore.” A tear made its way down his face as he watched his lover closely. “I can’t watch you hurt yourself like this. I can’t just sit back and do nothing to help you.” Another tear joined the first, and before he knew it, he was holding Ianto close and sobbing into his shoulder. “I don’t want to lose you.” Ianto was clutching Jack tightly, mumbling broken apologies into Jack’s chest as he began to cry himself. Tosh found them later, holding each other tightly as they looked into potential therapists for Ianto.

\---

Weeks later, Ianto was well on his road to recovery from the whole incident. He had been given several different types of pills for his depression as well as PTSD, something he hadn’t done before, even after Canary Wharf or the incident with Lisa. He had to admit, though, that it was helping. He slept better at night, and he could control the urge to injure himself. Jack still kept a close eye on him, but he was beginning to relax as he realized the love of his life was getting himself better. He walked into the bedroom one morning, carrying breakfast on a tray. He walked up to the bed, setting the tray on the bed and leaning down to kiss Ianto on the lips. Ianto shifted, sighing into the kiss, and as Jack pulled back, Ianto’s eyes fluttered open. He smiled at Jack, and Jack pulled the tray over.

“Happy Valentine’s Day,” he said softly, helping Ianto to sit up. He placed a vase with a single rose in it on the tray, and Ianto smiled.

“Thank you,” he said, leaning up to kiss Jack once more. He ate slowly, and once he’d finished, Jack cleared away the plates. Once he returned to the bedroom, he sat on the bed next to Ianto, pulling a wrapped box out of the dresser. “What is that?”

“Open it and find out,” Jack replied. Ianto opened the box to find a watch he’d had his eye on for a while. “Do you like it?”

“Jack, it’s perfect,” Ianto whispered, putting it on and leaning up to kiss him again. “Thank you.” He looked away, a look of sadness in his eyes. “I didn’t get you anything.”

“You give me something every day, Ianto,” Jack said. “You give me hope. You give my life meaning. You give me love.” He pulled the younger man closer. “And I wouldn’t give that up for anything.” Ianto knew, with Jack’s words, that everything would be all right.

**Author's Note:**

> Well then. I'm still unsure as to how I feel with this fic. I'm hoping that someone out there likes it more than I do. Constructive criticism is always welcome!


End file.
